Chaotic Bliss

This better be a good post since it has taken me over a week to sit down to write again. I have three kids. Forgive me.

Cooper...anyone who has ever met this child (or read about his antics on Facebook) can attest to the fact that he is a mess. A hot mess. He teaches me a whole lot about patience pretty much on a daily basis. He is the sweetest mean kid that there has ever been. As I sit here right now, he is putting smiley face stickers on the wall in our playroom. He's being quiet and nice, though, and the stickers will come off. Thankfully, he hasn't learned the fine art of pressing down on a sticker to make sure it's on good. "Perfect. I done." How can I get mad at that? 

The biggest and best thing he has ever taught me has been about trust. When he was about 15 months old he got super sick. We were in and out of the doctor's office for about a week with a fever that would come and go. One Sunday afternoon he spiked a fever of over 104 that would not come down with Tylenol or Ibuprofen. He was shaking with chills and lethargic and I panicked. We took him to Children's hospital and they still thought it was "just" a fever virus. They sent us home and told us to follow up with his doctor the next day.

After a sleepless night I had to drag that pitiful boy to the doctor for probably the fifth time in a week. I took him in his pajamas. That's a red flag, y'all. We don't leave the house in our jammies around here. At that point he was dehydrated, still running a high fever despite having a constant flow of medicine, and still lethargic. Our doctor at the time recommended that they admit him to the hospital for blood work and fluids at the very least. The poor, sweet nurses at the doctor's office tried to draw blood for the first round of blood work but couldn't get a good vein.

We got to the hospital and they took blood and started an IV. Mitchell was on his way from work but thankfully my mom was with me. If she hadn't been there, I don't know what I would have done. We had to hold him down in a hospital bed while they tried to get ultrasounds of his belly. We held him down while they took blood.  It literally took three adults to hold him down. I have a knot in my stomach just thinking about the way he cried. I think he had a ct scan and maybe even some xrays, too. I have blocked the rest of that day from my memory. All I remember is crying and praying. 

That night they moved us to the ICU where we felt horribly uncomfortable because we they were not set up for children. After some deliberation with Mitchell and my dad (who I have never seen look so scared), we requested to be transferred to Children's hospital. That night Cooper got his first ambulance ride. Good times. We arrived at Children's and immediately felt at peace with our decision. We got set up in a room, did more bloodwork, and talked to more doctors and nurses. 

After two nights at Children's Hospital and about a hundred million tests, we still didn't know what had been going on with him but his fever was finally coming down and he seemed to be feeling a little better. We were discharged and they told us to follow up with our doctor later in the week. By the time we went back to the doctor that week Cooper was feeling much better, but still not 100%. While I was talking to the doctor we realized that Cooper had never been tested for mono. It was one of the things that they were supposed to test for in the original blood draw at the doctor's office that they weren't able to do. St. Vincent's and Children's both thought he had already been tested so they didn't test him either. He was pretty confident at that point that was what the problem was, but we still don't really know for sure. 

We did a lot of trusting during that ordeal. We trusted God to heal our baby boy. We trusted countless doctors and nurses. We had to trust our own instincts and feelings and pray that we were doing the right thing for Cooper.

7 The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song.

Psalm 31:14

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.

Joshua 1:9